There are some things in life which do not work on pass and fail scales and a relationship with another individual, or even just dating someone would fall in that very category. But how often is it that you ask yourself, if you have fallen for the wrong person simply because there was strong attraction? Why is it such strong attraction, is a question that a lot of times, you may have no answer too though.
Simply put, it is your wounded-self that is playing the attraction from your side onto another individual and you may as well call it a subconscious decision! In other words, the wounded self-part of an individual is the part that makes them feel incomplete, question their life value and all the worth; this is the very reason why life doesn’t seem whole and the ‘little you’ wonders if you are lovable at all or not.
Here are some of the most common reasons as to why exactly is it that we attract the wrong kind of people or keep getting attracted to them unknowingly:
- The energetic signature of an individual- This specific kind of expression is often responsible for attracting the same kind of people that match our energy levels and signature moments just right. In the spur of the moment, a lot of people feel attracted to the other person who identifies to their kind of energy and expectations in just that moment itself.
- Inner you- If you often keep attracting the wrong kind of people then it becomes certain after a while that there is something within you that is resonating those people. It could also be the kind of things you do or a typical behavior that you or the other people have which attracts you to them.
- Past wounds and trauma- At times, some mental and emotional unpleasant experiences of the past stick with an individual and contribute to the kind of people who you get attracted to you in the future.
- Baggage of the soul-level- There are a lot of times when we make negative choices, have bad or not so great judgment or even just end up acting out of fear. All of these are just a few of the many reasons, but at the end, getting attracted to the wrong kind, to someone who can lighten our hearts and help us make different choices is also a choice with us in the end.
- Limiting beliefs- You could feel attracted to the wrong kind of people based on the kind of beliefs they have, since as limited as we make our choices of being attracted to someone, there are higher chances of us being right!
- Inadequate self-knowledge- More often than not, a person tends to give very little attention to his/her own self and thus don’t really know themselves well enough. As a result, knowing what it is that you want or need in life is also a very unclear thought in the head!
- Compensating self- A lot of men and women also try compensating for some sort of real or even perceived personalities in their minds by choosing a partner who has the qualities that they themselves lack. It is literally as everyone quotes so commonly- opposites attract!
- Resolving past hurts- this isn’t often a bad thing, but looking for a person who can always manage to fulfill unmet needs can cause you to overlook other relationship qualities and eventually make you realize the glitch.
If you keep finding yourself attracted to the members of the opposite sex and superficially at that, then taking a closer look at why is it always ending as a mismatch is the right thing to do. More you understand the reason for your attraction, higher are the chances of you being prepared and more stable for future choices.
When we ourselves are not entirely genuine or fully open to our own selves, experiencing profound loving connections is very difficult to achieve. Fear of getting hurt, being alone or even the simple fear of being rejected all end up lowering our expectations and no wonder, you end up feeling attracted to a wrong guy thereafter; someone who seems more likely to help you stay of fear and not challenge you enough starts seeming like an ideal match momentarily.
However, more often than not, you end up realizing that it’s never a happy feeling and once you start believing in your own self, embracing your true self and loving who you are, you may be able to feel the right way for someone who is worthy!
By identifying with your higher self, you can choose to grow beyond all the ego and self-questioning moments and save yourself the incomplete feeling and worthless attractions that were never meant