These days there’s insurance policy for every possession. You name it and there’s insurance for it be it house, jewelry, furniture and also body parts…like most athletes and celebrities do. No matter how strategically improved technology, insurance and other services in life become, and they will never be able to guarantee the dynamics in a relationship. Relationships are everyday work. One has to look into it each day with same amount of care and devotion. There is no set formula that will guarantee a seamless bond in a relationship for all times. One should be ready to put in effort relentlessly because once you stop doing it, the bond starts to weaken and ultimately fade.
I know it sounds like an uphill task and burdening to be done on a regular basis, however the secret is that you are not going to do it all by yourself. The responsibility in any relationship lies equally on all stakeholders who are involved in it. Each participant will have to make an honest effort, and mind it there is no shortcut.
Here are a few tips to implement the above-mentioned suggestion.
- Be flexible aka be easy going:Not everything in your life should be executed based on your principles. There are actions and words that may not like however not each word and action has to be as per your liking. Your partner is not your enemy but when two people from two different backgrounds come together there is bound to be differences in understanding and perspective. The only way ahead is to accept and respect another persons’ viewpoint.
- Make time, do things together: One of biggest mistakes any couple makes is to classify chores, duties and responsibilities based on gender roles. We grow up to learn certain set of activities belong to the ‘female’ figure and the others come as responsibilities of the ‘male’ figure in the family. Share work; chip in whenever you are there. Especially when everyone is complaining about not spending enough time together, working together can help bridge the need to do so.
- Pack-up and leave: All those adventure trips you always wanted to go and couldn’t; well, now you’ve a partner who can join you. Plan those long overdue trips and have the fun of your life. Company is always better.
- Do not drag tough times: We all have ego and we get instigated at smallest of issues however these are such non-issues. You may experience that some incident that happened a week back makes you laugh when you revisit them in the present. You realize all argument and counter- argument didn’t help you in anyway. Hence it is always better to let go.
- Treat each other special: Try to celebrate as much as possible. Small events in life can also be a reason for celebration. Even when there’s nothing exceptional, just go out for a candle light dinner. Have some alone time, where you are not worried about washing the dishes, cleaning the kitchen etc. This will definitely help release all that tension built-up inside.
- Plan together: With relationships falling apart each day, and if it is giving chills in your spine too, always assure your partner that you both are in for the long haul. Make future plans together for instances discuss finances, property purchase, annual holidays, having children, car purchase and so on. Not only will this make you feel the togetherness, you’ll also get know where you’ll stand in future.
- Don’t dwell in the past: Don’t let your insecurities rob you of all the mental and emotional peace. They sure are disturbing and the mere thought makes a person anxious, the thoughts zoom in all directions and dwelling upon them endlessly will make you miserable. It is an art to handle partner’s past relationships, however constantly exhausting yourself thinking about it, won’t lead you anywhere. Rather get the message across to him/ her and move on.
- Avoid technology: Yes, not only kids, you too are affecting your beautiful relationship with your partner because of the technology. The smart-phones, HD TV, play stations etc. keep them away. Shut them off for a while to spend quality time with your partner.
- Stay expressive: Like small good deeds, small pleasant talks also help go a long way. Appreciate each other, praise their achievements, compliment the new dress/ shirt/ tie/ sandals, and say they look beautiful. Encourage your partner when they’re down. Let them know when you’re pre-occupied or disturbed about something. Not only this helps you overcome the situation faster, you realize it’s not that big a deal and you move on.
- Always be ready to accept the bad days: They will be there, no matter how hard you try; there will be experiences that will pull you down. Never let that one bad day ruin your life in the long run. A bad mood may destroy the bond you’ve built with your partner over so many years with love and care.
There is always a way out if you believe in the relationship you’ve with your partner. Keep trying new food, places, outfit and all such activities that you two actually did when your relationship was new and blooming with love.